How soon should we spend the night together?

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Answered by: Johanna, An Expert in the Advice for Dating Category
Coffee shops are a personal favorite of mine. Not only do I get to enjoy that latte with an extra shot of espresso, I also get to hear all about people in various phases in their relationships. “How soon should we, you know.. spend the night together? I know everyone is doing ‘IT’ lately. I just don’t know the right time is.” A flaming face, and a head tilted to the side follows as she looks at her friends hoping they have the answer. The young ladies at the corner table are whispering together in an attempt at private conversation. Unfortunately, or fortunately, I just happen to be sitting nearby. “I think you should wait for love,” says the girl’s dark haired friend. “That is so old fashioned Sara,” laughs the blond to her left. Their poor friend just keeps turning red. It looks like she has a reoccurring sunburn. “I do love him. I have loved him since the day I met him. It was love at first sight,” she declares. Her brunette friend wants to know, how she knows its love, real love; this starts the girls fiercely debating for several minutes before it is decided she should wait at least another week, maybe two. Across the room, a couple is gazing into each others eyes, as their lust.. I mean love for each other seems to be getting stronger by the moment.

Sitting side by side for a moment, they each take a drink and start to talk at the same time. Suddenly lips are touching, fingers are raking through hair, bodies are being pressed together and the audience seems to be growing while they are totally unaware. I would be surprised if the question, “How soon should we have sex?” even stood a chance. They are already headed for the door almost running over a couple sitting outside. They seem to be arguing over something and it’s not looking good for them. Sighing, I stand and make my way to the counter. There is a lovely piece of cheesecake; exactly what I needed! I ask the guy behind the counter for 2 forks. He looks at me, eyebrow raised but hands me another fork. I put a few dollars into the tip jar and say goodnight. I feel like a little fresh air would be great right about now. Just outside the door the young couple is no longer arguing but still looking angry and silent.

Placing the cheesecake on the table between them I say, “Such a cute couple! Enjoy the desert on the house.” I smile and go back inside to finish my latte. The cheesecake has hands creeping forward to pick up forks. Slowly the cheesecake disappears and smiles start to replace the angry glares. I know the cheesecake would have been delicious but there are still some pastries I may have try. I start laughing as the thought, “How long should I wait?” pops into my head. Not even another second because I am already walking towards the counter, money in hand and debating, “raspberry or blueberry.. ”

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